so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
(917) i just came from walking.
haha you just came from walking?
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Probably shouldn't have worn my jeans covered in blood from last night to class.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
This may be hard to believe, but that wasn't the first time I was fingered under a snuggie
It's not
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
you would have been so proud of how classy i just looked at the pharmacy with my $10 off plan b coupon. so resourceful.
He called my IUD an IED, and said that’s why I had bomb pussy.... I didn’t correct him
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