Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
He's socially awkward. He has a big dick. We've had this talk before, they're socially awkward because they don't leave the house they just sit home and play with it.
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize
