I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Im so hungover
Come over i have rolls
Ecstasy rolls or Challah rolls?
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
Kinda forgot to grab tampons. Mind if I run to my house to get one? I'd rather not turn my green skinny jeans Christmas colors
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
He can't just hit it and quit it and then eat your pop tarts on his way out.
You casually put your finger in my ass and other people are weird..
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
This should be illegal
It is
I mean more illegal... I shouldn't have this
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