Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
Heating the house with the oven may not be safe but at least it's always preheated
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
considering I just took 3 shots of fireball I don't think I'm coming back tonight. also the hulk just walked in crushing beer cans on his forehead
I am one with the molecules
You know it was a weird week when you have a mystery bruise and youre unsure if it was from crazy sex or getting bit by a duck. Life.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
