So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
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He had to carry me to the car. But then sat with me and waited for me to sober up enough to have sex. He's a keeper.
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
Had sex in a cemetery last night during a thunderstorm. I feel like my goth points have skyrocketed
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
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I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
I vaguely remember ordering a water at some point last night. It's good to know drunk me can still be responsible.
There is eyeliner on my toilet. Vodka and I have a love hate relationship.
I dont understand why i cant be a wizard
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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