Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
if i died would you start the facebook group?
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
disregard all texts ive sent you minus taco motherfucking bell
Speaking is such a hard concept right now
I don't think there was a moment this weekend where grey goose did not course through my veins
He told me he felt like he was just pistol-whipped by Testicle Man.
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
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