it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
if i'm ever face-down on the ground puking again, promise me you won't try to braid my hair?
Hey to make you feel better about last night, I just shit my pants.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
I'm considering having a threesome with my friend just so I can sleep with his boyfriend and not feel guilty about it.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
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