HIV tests are more positive than that guy
can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
Currently bar hopping with 30 Navy SEALS. I know i'm safe but damn its hard to pick up chicks when you feel like a big pussy.
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
He's. Duct. Taping. His. Phone. To. The. Wall.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Dude, she had a pound of gunpowder in her closet. I for sure got a fear boner.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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