When I was her age, Pluto was still a planet... but i said what the hell
there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
woke up on the kitchen floor in the recovery position. at least drunk me remembered sober me's emt training
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
Randomize
