i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
The highlight of my night was definitely explaining the bandaid on my nipple.
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
Is buying her a loofah for my house commitment like? I don't wanna give the wrong idea
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Dude, I passed out on the side walk, lost my phone and shirt, and walked 12 miles home after I disappeared from the club
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
Three times. Three times I left home yesterday in search for sex, and three times I returned un-orgasmed.
Randomize
