rhymes with "ouble enetration"
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
You can fuck right off with that, "If the earthquake isnt bigger than 5.0, we native Californians dont get out of bed." I am from Chicago. I can handle freak flash floods, polar vortexes and tornados. But my bed violently shaking at 6:30 in the morning is cause for some understandable concern.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
