Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
whose ass print is on the piano?
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Nothing says Panama City like condoms washing up on the shore.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
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