I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
New plan, instead of sleeping with her, I'm just going to use her to sleep with the entire sorority.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
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My cousin had a baby so we have to look at it. Apparently the event is byob
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
And then I was like pick your blow job song and he choose the sonic the hedgehog theme song. If he's not the one no one is.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Also, in case they didn’t tell you… there is a chicken living in your old room… so I would assume cleaning that is now on them
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