no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
we just got kicked out of the mexican restaurant. i have a full pitcher of margarita's hiding under my coat.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Worst way to find out I have a half sister
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Going to jail. Warrant. Be home late. For the love of god turn your ringer on.
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