never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
Do you remember trying to sleep under the pool table while wearing a reflective vest?
Nope.
You kept saying you had to be safe.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
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