Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
Yea, remember to blow out the fire from flaming shots. Unless you want burnt lips. Just saying, I'm an example of ignorance and intoxication.
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
I'm texting an actual stripper. A male stripper. I dont wanna talk about it yet
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
