careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
Almost to work. And still feel hungover. Like my body is trying to regenerate after dying. Full on zombie shit. But like, one of those zombies from warm bodies that comes back to life slowly.
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we need to dedicate ourselves to building your stamina back to uterus breaking level
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
The sex was so good we high-fived after.
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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