we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Come camping we have xanax and steaks
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
She's officially a Tinder poltergeist.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
