Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
i felt like we were having sex on ultimate fighter, and people on the outside kept yelling ELBOW ELBOW! KNEES KNEES!
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
Last night you told me to stop being Martha Stewart and asked if I had Taco Bell in my house
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl this is ridiculous I told my self that I would stop having sex in stairwells yet it keeps happening
With gravity the way it is and your butt clearly being the size of a bus you'd break your hip or something
I HAVE DISCOVERED LONDON AND IT FILLS ME WITH JOY
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
I just set my mike's hard down and didn't want it to spill, so I held my finger up and told it to shoosh. I'm drunk.
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
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