it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
so..some girl walked up to me on the porch last night. She came to apologize for peeing on our lawn a few days ago. I just looked at her and said it was ok, she wasn't the first.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
javelin tossed one of my crutches in to the mosh pit at the concert, hit some dude in the temple hahah fuck him he sucks
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
I just heard a crying baby from out my apartment window and yelled SAME
Look, I am sorry I shaved your cat...but get over it.
Randomize