i barfeds in our rink
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
Her cooch smelled like a combination of bacon and sweat.
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
I just threw in a dip with a guy that superglued his fake tooth back in today. My life is complete.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
Stop calling him just to say, "my vagina misses you."
You're even getting laid in my dreams, god I'm a good wingman
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
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