I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
So many bounce houses so little time
You know you're fucked up when you throw your phone on the roof of the bar to show how good the Otter Box works.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Homophobes nationwide are huddled in their bunkers tonight and I can't stop giggling. Could be the wine.
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
He's ready to settle down, whereas I'm like "More shots please"
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
