If i could tip my vagina, i would.
Yeah, I have to wait a few months then take a sample in, I asked the doctor if the sample could be wiped off my wife's back...i told her he said face only.
My bracket is officially just a list of teams that lost.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
We need to pull ourselves out of this slump. We need dick and lots of it. We are going to fuck our way to happiness.
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Worst walk of shame man. They had a fire drill at 7am, had to walk out of her all girl dorm wearing my Everday I'm Hustling sweater
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Birthday wine tasting got super shambly super quickly. I am covered in cuts/bruises/terrible life decisions.
Randomize
