omg i finished an entire carton of double double chunk chunk ice cream last night...
what? what exactly is in double double chunk chunk?
self-loathing.
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
party gras won. party gras always wins.
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
I don't deserve a penis
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Can you masturbate to someone liking your instagram picture?
Randomize
