So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
At Wal-Mart last night I watched two guys scramble for $4.34 to pay for a pack of ping pong balls and red solo cups. They had to put the .34 on a credit card. Winter break begins!
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
She's not a foreskin expert like you
because. if I can't sit outside naked and eat my watermelon every morning then I really don't see the point in moving in with you.
Got too starbucks. 3out of the 4 girls working i have ducked and haven't ever called. My coffee has dick written on it. It may contain spit by pumpkin lattes are only once a year
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
Im so drunk and the cops showed up so i ran on all 4's through the woods because i had no shoes hoping they would mistake me for a fox
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
