so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
they call him the transporter because he'll be your designated driver in exchange for sufficient weed or sex.\n
what about money
no - he has a code he lives by
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I threw up this morning to Silent Night playing in background. It was actually quite soothing.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Randomize
