atleast your grandma didn't give you her USED dildo just so you wouldn't have sex.
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
i ran around the party telling everyone that my favorite sexual position was also the only position that made me queef...i kept calling it the "double edged sword"
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
sitting on the counter. eating honey. crying, because coldplay sounds beautiful on the radio. highhhhh as the sky
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Also I'm sitting home alone with a big ass bowl of marshmallows right now just eating. It's so sad.
I punted my pants across my apt at my roommate last night. Everything else is kinda fuzzy.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Randomize