Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Who cheats on Christmas eve? It's just asking for Jesus to hate you
When I start puking tomorrow, just let me be. it'll start around 8:35. just let me heave. i love this part of my morning.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
So roofie roulette was a success but I'm a little worried that the 2 who got the tainted beer still haven't contacted anyone...
I just messaged a senior at Harvard and told him to 'tinder me softly'
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
