I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
He picked me up in Smart Car with the license plate “MYWHIP.” I think my ovaries shriveled up and died.
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