The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
So apparently the only parts of last night I remember didn't actually happen.. When did vodka become a hallucinogen?
I just saw an easily 300lb shirtless man on a Vespa. My day has been simultaneously made and ruined.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
I feel like a sex bomb and I need to go explode on somebody
Wasted. And I have 5 pounds of potatoes that I'm responsible for.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
be the chaos you wish to see in the world...
i'm trying to figure out how to respond to that in text
Randomize
