Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(207): View more from Maine

I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid.

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(207): I blacked out in 45 minutes and woke up with a missed call from someone I saved in my phone as the karate kid. http://tfl.nu/67sh

Replies (15) Good night (6848) Bad night (748)
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(702): View more from Nevada

I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever

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(702): I wish we could go back in time and find our best farts ever http://tfl.nu/c1jo

Replies (11) Good night (2124) Bad night (1210)
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(519): View more from Ontario

You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.

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(519): You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night. http://tfl.nu/cmtj

Replies (3) Good night (2257) Bad night (768)
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(937): View more from Ohio

Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon!

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(937): Dude, I just saw a sixteen year old girl in a catholic school uniform buying a pregnancy test... With a coupon! http://tfl.nu/1aph

Replies (92) Good night (13838) Bad night (1672)
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(360): View more from Washington

corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.

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(360): corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me. http://tfl.nu/hdp7

Replies (3) Good night (1035) Bad night (1369)
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(+32): View more from Belgium

It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched

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(+32): It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched http://tfl.nu/cbi6

Replies (3) Good night (995) Bad night (512)
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(412): View more from Pennsylvania

This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.

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(412): This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him. http://tfl.nu/rlpz

Replies (6) Good night (1401) Bad night (595)
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(336): View more from North Carolina

It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo?

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(336): It's national boyfriend day supposedly, would it be appropriate if I posted a picture of my dildo? http://tfl.nu/6rh5

Replies (7) Good night (1395) Bad night (550)
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(850): View more from Florida

Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list.

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(850): Who had my phone last night? Whoever it was sent "Fuck you, you're adopted" to half the people on my contact list. http://tfl.nu/5auq

Replies (6) Good night (1431) Bad night (565)
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(812): View more from Indiana

Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee

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(812): Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee http://tfl.nu/tqb3

Replies (3) Good night (690) Bad night (451)
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(546): View more from

As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever.

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(546): As we were about to go at it, his roommates barged in singing jumper by third eye blind. Weirdest almost one night stand ever. http://tfl.nu/al3c

Replies (3) Good night (440) Bad night (712)
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(248): View more from Michigan

I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life

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(248): I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life http://tfl.nu/uyc5

Replies (2) Good night (620) Bad night (445)
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(209): View more from California

Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?

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(209): Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist? http://tfl.nu/g9wp

Replies (3) Good night (697) Bad night (273)
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(843): View more from South Carolina

Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!

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(843): Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs! http://tfl.nu/zm1r

Replies (0) Good night (379) Bad night (245)
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(231): View more from Michigan

Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.

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(231): Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did. http://tfl.nu/4mxe

Replies (0) Good night (490) Bad night (329)

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