First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
She's just done the monthly not prego dance around our kitchen
I got kicked out of the bar for suggesting that the bartender drop her tits into my Redbull instead of the usual liquor
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I found a used condom in my purse this morning. It was in there with a bunch of smushed french fries.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
