I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I've officially put my junk in foods from 5 of the 6 layers of the nutrition pyramid
Mission leave-the-puke-on-the-floor-til-the-dog-eats-it completed. I work smarter not harder
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Did your dad mention the fact that you asked him for viagra at 2 in the morning?
You were wasted and fell in a pond when you met him, it's not like you were on top of your game
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
We are going to be Siegfried and Roy for Halloween and you are going to be the tiger.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
My dry spell starts kindergarten this fall...
They grow up so fast.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
Randomize
