Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
Life lesson. Learning to pee left handed is easier than learning brickbreaker left handed. Rather lose a few drops than a few lives
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
I wonder if she thought to herself "I'm gonna sleep with that guy tonight" when she watched me puke on the bar at 3 in the afternoon?
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
Wow my largely unnecessary pool of lizard-related knowledge finally came in handy. Are you proud?
I don't know what to say
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Randomize