You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
Her boobs are too amazing to be looking at my dick. I'm even ashamed.
ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
How long is a courtesy make out supposed to last??
Remember when you picked me up from my walk of shame with a bike, I came out wearing a Ninja Turtle costume and you let me ride the pegs to thoroughly display the embarassment
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
All I want to do is drink an excessive amount of free alcohol bought from strange men, while taking frequent trips to the bathroom to snort an assortment of illicit drugs off dirty toilet seats. Break cannot get here quick enough...
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