Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
i saw her thong sticking out from across the bar...that was my cue
is the shake weight an appropriate valentine's day present?
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."
I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
ecstacy + fleshlight = not all that upset about being newly single anymore
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
I could have sworn that I went home last night... but judging from the couch I just woke up on, apparently not.
Randomize
