OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
this must be what syphilis tastes like
Fuck you. how could you leave me passed out hangin out my truck window when you knew it was starting to rain?
I smoked a bowl while he ate me out, you need to change your major to match making asap. You are a guru of love.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got invited to party with a bunch of elderly lesbians I am in no position to offer life advice
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
All I know is that I have a black eye and an extra $200 in my wallet. Other than that, clueless.
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize