Your tits are I can't wait for
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Little spoons don't ask big questions
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I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
We have such limited time together he literally sends me text messages that are like "I sent my roommates on an impossible quest, we have 15 minutes." it's that bad.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I need time to grow out my leg hair and not be sad anymore
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My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
day drinking didnt prepare me for this..
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
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