I'm in a room alone pouting because I got the wrong nachos at taco bell.
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I'm picking out a half way decent top so if I get arrested I'll have a respectable mug shot photo. Always be prepared.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
The best part of that night wasn't even the sex, it was listening to her explain to her boyfriend why she was naked in her room while I hid in her closet.
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
I'd recommend you leave that level of crazy to the experts. I'd start with an under appreciated soccer mom if I were you.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
