Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
LMAO!!! just remembered you said this to me last night. "sometimes you post too many Jesus tweets. It's not that that's really bad... But I roll my eyes and you should know that."
I was drunk but it's true
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I woke up 25 minutes ago and have been high for 20. Impressive?
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
I made out with a girl because I wanted to get in the VIP section of the bar because they have these big comfy couches. It worked.
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Once you find out someone has a small dick, you never look at them the same again.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
Randomize
