you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
How much cunt could a cunt bag punch if a cunt bag could punch cunt?
fuck your aforementioned shoe
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
He was trying to be aggressive in bed, but in reality, it was like watching a declawed cat try to climb a curtain. They WANT it, they just can't DO it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
Please tell me how the stripper got back to Sarah's from the trailer park
I woke up with a jacket; in it passport, hockey tickets, sunglasses, credit card, bank transactions
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