I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
I misjudged the power of my pelvic thrusting capabilities. His nose is broken. Thoughts?
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so you know how I brush my teeth after I give you a bj? according to my dentist my teeth have never been cleaner. looks like this will be a recurring thing
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
When are you getting back?
Well google maps doesn't have an estimated time for crawling... Could be days
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