try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
I just don't see what's wrong with carrying a water bottle around.
It's not the bottle. It's the fact that you're drinking wine out of a sport bottle at 9 am.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Am I allowed to compare getting cum'd on the face to a warm summer rain?
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Let's just say that in a last ditch effort to avoid getting arrested I said to the cop "but I'm not even that drunk" and he proceeded to point out (in front of a crowd) that I had "fucking pissed my pants"
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
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