there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
Banged a lazy eyed chick last night. It was like fucking an iguana.
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
found a rock and smashed the sliding glass door. home safe. screen door is locked so we're good.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
There are apples in the microwave and a cup of twigs in the fridge. I think she's hiding in the pantry, I can hear her giggling. Leaving her to it.
She's trying to feed the TV fried rice and screaming "FRIED RICE AND TEARS". Please bring me more booze.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
He looked at me like he knew me, and I looked at him like I had seen his penis before.
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize
