were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
you think that next time i come over to do this you can pick up the condom wrappers you used on the other girls
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
My sheer presence has sent the hipsters running in terror. I expect no problems.
We kinda got asked to leave the strip club and on the way out, you fell again. When you finally got up we got a standing ovation from the girls behind the bar and you took a bow. It was awesome.
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
There's a super pregnant woman here complaining about back pain. I better not see a live birth in the hair care aisle
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
Stop making fun of my hookups!
Stop getting hookups that I can make fun of!
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
Randomize
