six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
You can now add 30,000 feet to the places where I have puked
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
I just watched a stripper purchase $43 of Rockstar and corn nuts. Godamnit! We need helmet cams.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
If he brings home bacon, dont let him leave. Dont screw this one up. this may be our last chance.
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