im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
i think he saw me take a picture of his dick
I fucked your brother... Hey, at least we know he is not gay... You're welcome.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
Partying with my eighth grade history teacher I know you're jealous
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
