Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
wouldve been great, if we lived in constant slow motion cause that shit lasted 30 seconds and half the time he was putting on the condom
so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
last nights makeup is better than no makeup at all.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Stop studying come to the bar get drunk and help me figure out how to get home pretend there are commas in there someplace
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
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