It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
he saw my emergency pass-out-in-the-bathroom-after-drunken-puking cot in the bathroom.
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
Dignity is for republicans.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
From the trajectory of the puke, I must have fallen off the top bunk while trying to vomit, due to the dented bucket, ruined carpet, and bruised dignity I now own.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Also, we just got yelled at by a cop for being awesome...or making out in a fountain. Whatever.
Looking at an apartment in Houston. It's right beside my favorite bar and the zoo. Best or worst decision?
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Randomize
