OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
two words...techno handjob
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
I'm 50% sure my cousin put weed in these deviled eggs.
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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