i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just bonged a beer from a vuvuzela...this place is only doing good for me
I automatically know you're drunk now as soon as you start yelling in spanish
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
He bought you footie pajamas. Shit's pretty serious.
I decided not to look up the nudes, because I believe that there is a line, and that mocking my old classmate's horrid nudes alone crosses that line.
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
Don't judge me. It's a Monday night and I can eat burritos in while bathing in the kitchen sink if I want to.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
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